The Terrorist Years
Notorious Terrorist HuskyX (aka Bandit) apprehended by FBI Agent Fox Mulder. He attempted to elude capture by disguising himself as a reindeer.
Earlier in his life, Bandit joined an underground terrorist organization. My guess is the initial recruitment was made clandestinely at the so-called "obedience school". I should have suspected his political leanings. When he was a puppy, I came home one day to find my copy of "No Bad Dogs - Training your dog" to be subtlety altered: The chapter on "First Steps - Training Your Puppy" had been removed, and there were suspicious tooth marks on the cover. That should have shown me the signs of a higher intelligence at work, but I ignored them.
Further proof of what the future would bring was in the following tale I found on a web site:
My name is Sherlock. My human kept most of my brothers and sisters, and at 5 months of age, the 5 of us had a great time. My human had a "dog proof" room in the basement for us. However, there was a garden hose sticking out underneath the door to the laundry room. Since Mom had gone to work, and we had nothing to do... I believe it was Preston who pulled on the hose. Cherry helped. That forced the door open. Scarlet and Fawn ran into the room first. WHERE TO START??
Let me tell you, we had fun. We took all the clothes out of the baskets, and spread them on the floor. We moved the WASHING MACHINE out from the wall. . .about 5 feet (we really re-arranged the room). Cherry got a broom and ran around with it sticking up in the air, and broke all the light bulbs in the room. This added broken glass to the clothes on the floor. We also found a bag of potting soil; we made sure it was spread evenly across the room.
Mom had a 270 gal. fish tank in that room (yes, more than 6 ft long and 3 ft. wide). There was only one very valuable fish in it. Cherry jumped in and went for a swim, and scared the fish so badly he had a heart attack and went belly up. (At least we didn't eat him). We splashed a lot of the water out of the tank. . . it mixed well with the potting soil, glass, and clothes on the floor.
Next we pulled over the ironing board. You could tell that we had carried that all over the room, because of the dents in the cabinets.
We pulled on the hose, which was great fun. We almost pulled the pipe out of the wall. We did manage to get the water turned on, which was still running when Mom got home. This mixed the potting soil, and glass into the clothes on the floor. We managed to chew up the hose, too.
We tried to pull the copper pipe off the water heater, but just didn't get that job completed. Cherry did pull all the bristles out of the broom, and they mixed with the clothes, dirt,... you get the picture.
After we dented the cabinets with the ironing board, we found that they opened pretty easily, and there was stuff stored in them. We were sure that was a mistake, so we pulled all the stuff out of the cabinets, and put it on the floor, and stomped on it.
Then we emptied the trash. That was a lay-up. The most fun was the dryer lint that was in the trash. We ripped that all apart, and spread it everywhere.
I wasn't watching, but one of my brothers or sisters managed to smear the window in that basement room. Since it is so high off the floor, I'm not sure how they did it. We were hiding the evidence from the neighbors.
The door must have swung shut behind us, and scared us, because we decided we needed to take drastic measures to get out of the laundry room. Preston dug through the dry-wall. He got most of the way through. But the rest of us chewed on the door, and removed a large section of it, and, we managed to free ourselves.
When Mom came home, we were all sitting in the dog room, like little angels. The missing part of the door gave us away, though. Mom didn't even say anything when she went into the laundry room. Later, I heard her say something about being SPEECHLESS. We just woo-wooed at her, and wagged our fuzzy butts. We were not really BAD dogs. . . I mean, other than the fish, no one got hurt, even with all that glass. Unfortunately, Mom said she was taking no further chances, and after that we had to say in our kennels, or our crates when she was gone. Bummer. Sherlock, Preston, Cherry, Scarlet, and Fawn; 5 fun loving Siberian Huskies. (Mom took pictures, because she said no one would believe her. Now every time someone talks to her about getting a Siberian puppy, she shows the photos. How embarrassing!)
But I was in Denial (which is not a river in Egypt). My Bandit do that? No way. But the warning signs were there:
The next step in the terrorist master plan was to ruin my reputation in the community. Thus was begun the covert operation "Death to Hated Library Books". Every few months, I would find one or two books from the public library to have suffered the fate of a sneak attack. Eventually, after a period of time, I was banned from the Library and couldn't go out in public for fear of the community's scorn. I ended up having more free time with nothing to read and would take Bandit for more walks. Obviously a well executed plan, I played right into their paws.
The War of Terror escalates:
A list of demands was presented:
1. more walks
2. more rear-end scratching
3. salmon for breakfast
4. immunity from prosecution for eating squirrels, cats and other small furry critters
5. more walks
Since I didn't capitulate to the demands, a decision was made to strike again. Covert surveillance had determined that I spent a large part of my day in my home office, interacting with computers and not with huskies. That would be the target. The plan was put into effect. They would show no mercy.
Time passed ...
The FBI evidence labs determined the attack was by a Siberian Husky Terrorist organization. There was also some evidence linking Siberian Huskies with aliens, so one day Agents Mulder and Scully showed up at my door.
After a massive dog hunt, the criminal terrorist HuskyX was captured (see photo above). After a short trial, HuskyX (aka Bandit) was sentenced to confinement at the White Clay Creek Dog Confinement Center in Landenberg, Pennsylvania to serve out his sentence. Justice has been served.
Earlier in his life, Bandit joined an underground terrorist organization. My guess is the initial recruitment was made clandestinely at the so-called "obedience school". I should have suspected his political leanings. When he was a puppy, I came home one day to find my copy of "No Bad Dogs - Training your dog" to be subtlety altered: The chapter on "First Steps - Training Your Puppy" had been removed, and there were suspicious tooth marks on the cover. That should have shown me the signs of a higher intelligence at work, but I ignored them.
Further proof of what the future would bring was in the following tale I found on a web site:
My name is Sherlock. My human kept most of my brothers and sisters, and at 5 months of age, the 5 of us had a great time. My human had a "dog proof" room in the basement for us. However, there was a garden hose sticking out underneath the door to the laundry room. Since Mom had gone to work, and we had nothing to do... I believe it was Preston who pulled on the hose. Cherry helped. That forced the door open. Scarlet and Fawn ran into the room first. WHERE TO START??
Let me tell you, we had fun. We took all the clothes out of the baskets, and spread them on the floor. We moved the WASHING MACHINE out from the wall. . .about 5 feet (we really re-arranged the room). Cherry got a broom and ran around with it sticking up in the air, and broke all the light bulbs in the room. This added broken glass to the clothes on the floor. We also found a bag of potting soil; we made sure it was spread evenly across the room.
Mom had a 270 gal. fish tank in that room (yes, more than 6 ft long and 3 ft. wide). There was only one very valuable fish in it. Cherry jumped in and went for a swim, and scared the fish so badly he had a heart attack and went belly up. (At least we didn't eat him). We splashed a lot of the water out of the tank. . . it mixed well with the potting soil, glass, and clothes on the floor.
Next we pulled over the ironing board. You could tell that we had carried that all over the room, because of the dents in the cabinets.
We pulled on the hose, which was great fun. We almost pulled the pipe out of the wall. We did manage to get the water turned on, which was still running when Mom got home. This mixed the potting soil, and glass into the clothes on the floor. We managed to chew up the hose, too.
We tried to pull the copper pipe off the water heater, but just didn't get that job completed. Cherry did pull all the bristles out of the broom, and they mixed with the clothes, dirt,... you get the picture.
After we dented the cabinets with the ironing board, we found that they opened pretty easily, and there was stuff stored in them. We were sure that was a mistake, so we pulled all the stuff out of the cabinets, and put it on the floor, and stomped on it.
Then we emptied the trash. That was a lay-up. The most fun was the dryer lint that was in the trash. We ripped that all apart, and spread it everywhere.
I wasn't watching, but one of my brothers or sisters managed to smear the window in that basement room. Since it is so high off the floor, I'm not sure how they did it. We were hiding the evidence from the neighbors.
The door must have swung shut behind us, and scared us, because we decided we needed to take drastic measures to get out of the laundry room. Preston dug through the dry-wall. He got most of the way through. But the rest of us chewed on the door, and removed a large section of it, and, we managed to free ourselves.
When Mom came home, we were all sitting in the dog room, like little angels. The missing part of the door gave us away, though. Mom didn't even say anything when she went into the laundry room. Later, I heard her say something about being SPEECHLESS. We just woo-wooed at her, and wagged our fuzzy butts. We were not really BAD dogs. . . I mean, other than the fish, no one got hurt, even with all that glass. Unfortunately, Mom said she was taking no further chances, and after that we had to say in our kennels, or our crates when she was gone. Bummer. Sherlock, Preston, Cherry, Scarlet, and Fawn; 5 fun loving Siberian Huskies. (Mom took pictures, because she said no one would believe her. Now every time someone talks to her about getting a Siberian puppy, she shows the photos. How embarrassing!)
But I was in Denial (which is not a river in Egypt). My Bandit do that? No way. But the warning signs were there:
 |
| "Frisbees should NOT be made of foam!" |
 |
| "I thought you were done with that paper?" |
 |
| Opps, I think someone's at the door. I better go check...Oh, ignore that mess behind me. |
The next step in the terrorist master plan was to ruin my reputation in the community. Thus was begun the covert operation "Death to Hated Library Books". Every few months, I would find one or two books from the public library to have suffered the fate of a sneak attack. Eventually, after a period of time, I was banned from the Library and couldn't go out in public for fear of the community's scorn. I ended up having more free time with nothing to read and would take Bandit for more walks. Obviously a well executed plan, I played right into their paws.
The War of Terror escalates:
A list of demands was presented:
1. more walks
2. more rear-end scratching
3. salmon for breakfast
4. immunity from prosecution for eating squirrels, cats and other small furry critters
5. more walks
Since I didn't capitulate to the demands, a decision was made to strike again. Covert surveillance had determined that I spent a large part of my day in my home office, interacting with computers and not with huskies. That would be the target. The plan was put into effect. They would show no mercy.
 |
| The Office - the 1st Attack books, manuals and paperwork destroyed |
 |
| My Office - the 2nd Attack original software and disks destroyed |
After a massive dog hunt, the criminal terrorist HuskyX was captured (see photo above). After a short trial, HuskyX (aka Bandit) was sentenced to confinement at the White Clay Creek Dog Confinement Center in Landenberg, Pennsylvania to serve out his sentence. Justice has been served.
 |
| Fellow inmates at the Landenberg Detention facility |
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